Deadly Thoughts

Psalm 3:1-2 “O Lord, how many are my foes! How many rise up against me! Many are saying of me, ‘God will not deliver him.’ Selah”

armyYou know the story. Good guys surrounded by the enemy, wondering how in the world they can defeat the undefeatable. The bad guys are bigger, stronger, wield more powerful weapons, and show no mercy in their faces. Sound familiar? It should, if you’ve ever seen any superhero movie (yes, we recently saw the latest Avengers movie). The only difference with the movies is that we, the audience, know the good guys always win in the end. If not all, at least most of them. No matter how intense the battle scene is, how much it may appear that evil will overcome good, the movie continues until there’s a happy ending!

Unfortunately, we don’t always have that same assurance when we’re faced with a similar situation in real life. Or do we? While David was no stranger to real-life battles, I believe he also experienced many mental battles. You see, often the enemy armies can be so strong and powerful in our minds that we hear voices saying, “God will not deliver you. Look at you, you’re so far under it’s hopeless.” And don’t tell me I’m the only one who hears voices in my head. If you don’t, listen harder. You will. Any time we’re tempted to think we’re not good enough, we can’t do it, or it’s too much to bear, that’s the enemy whispering those thoughts into our minds.

In the verses above, the word “Selah” means to pause and think. I’m not sure why David wanted to stop and reflect on the fact that his enemies were so strong that he wondered if he’d make it out alive. I wonder if as he thought about it more and more, he knew he needed to make a decision to change the way his thoughts were headed. We’ll see below the change in his thinking in the next verse.

For me, it was the whispers telling me that God had left me, that He didn’t care about me anymore, and had no desire to hear my prayers or comfort me in my deep grief. In fact, I remember one moment when I told Him I wouldn’t be surprised if He chose to take my husband from us (he underwent surgery during this time so this wasn’t a completely crazy, out of the blue thought). The enemy armies were rising up against me, closing in fast, and the more I let myself meditate on these thoughts, the more I sunk into a numb depression. I couldn’t even compile words to form a good blog post. I had nothing left.

If you’ve ever seen God’s Not Dead 2, you’ll nod and smile before you even finish reading this paragraph, remembering the wisdom given to Grace from her grandfather. There’s a part in it when she can’t see anything positive in her situation. She feels despair as she has prayed and asked God for help. The scene I remember vividly is when she confides in her grandfather, expressing her confusion at not hearing from God. He was silent, offering no comfort or guidance, very much like He was doing with me. Grace’s grandfather asked her very simply, (I’m paraphrasing as I can’t remember the exact wording), you’re a teacher, when your students are taking a test, do you help them or give them the answers?

Does It Matter What We Think? God promises us that He always cares for us and will never leave us. Psalm 34:18 says, “The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves such as have a contrite spirit (or whose spirits are crushed).” But sometimes, I guess we need to go through things at times when He is silent. It doesn’t mean He’s not there. It means we need to regroup mentally and stand up against the enemy armies with the weapons we have before they defeat us. I will tell you, it may seem impossible, when you’re down for the count, bleeding, bruised, broken, and weak. But remember, God’s name is YHWH. “I Am.” He is with us to “get it done.” God doesn’t lie.

Recently I had a very low time. We just happened to be at church one morning when I was really struggling. A dear woman I’ve known for years sat behind me. As I sat there with my head in my hands and prayed that God would somehow let me know that He heard me and was there, she leaned forward and spoke a wonderful word of encouragement to me that God had given her. The part I want to share with you is this. God wanted to say to me, “let’s go together and get this done.” In other words, stand up and put on your armour because I Am with you to the finish.

What armour? Ephesians chapter 6 describes it: the belt of truth, the breastplate of righteousness, the shoes of the gospel of peace, the shield of faith, helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, or the word of God. David was no stranger to battle so he must’ve known this and realized it. As we see in the next verse, Psalm 3:3, he begins to turn his thoughts around. Yes, Lord, I am outnumbered. I cannot handle this on my own, it’s too much. I don’t feel Your presence. “BUT (my emphasis) You, O Lord, are a shield for me, my glory and the One who lifts up my head. I cried to the Lord with my voice, and He heard me from His holy hill.” Put on your armour, and together, let’s finish this life strong!

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